Not that anybody should believe me even a little...

[leigh57]

Shamelessly adapted from sardonicynic's recent post:

Pick a character or pairing from 24 (sorry to be so specific, but it's where my brain is right now), give me some a song lyric, and I will attempt at least 100 words of fic for you.

I know. I didn't write any of them last time. So I understand if you're all just like, PFT. However, my brain is in this mood where it just can't settle down, and I'd really like to find out if I'm capable of writing anything that doesn't turn into a thousand words minimum. I'm teaching all week, so I can mess with these at work, too:)

I think I'll cap it at 12 though, because even that's probably ambitious, given my recent success with prompts.

Crystal, I'm so excited to prompt you I'm squeaking;)

Comments

[dealan311.livejournal.com]

Okay gonna change it up a bit and recycle a prompt I gave you ages ago, but give it to someone else:

Larry/Renee, I never wanted to fit in any place except your heart (archie star, apologies on napkins).

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Something is wrong with me. I choked up just reading that. No joke.

[dealan311.livejournal.com]

It could be worse. I could have done my cracky J/R version of "I'll never tell" and you'd be tearing up for a totally different reason.

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

*dies*

Okay you win. That would have been so much worse. But what you get is gonna be cracky in anyway;) Sort of.

Why do I not have a non-funny Larry icon?

Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

She never believed in this place. Now she’s here.

Her brother would have laughed, said I told you so. In flashes, she appreciates the irony, but she guesses she’s supposed to feel lucky and she feels . . . alone.

The knock makes her jump. Fuck. She was never this jittery when she was . . . alive?

“I’m coming!” she yells, half-regretting the bitter veneer that shrink-wraps her words. She cinches the soft tie on her fluffy pale-blue bathrobe and tries not to think how badly she wants the . . . other one. The one with see-through elbows and coffee stains on the front.

She swings the door open. Larry’s standing there, hair damp but combed, holding two steaming cups of coffee.

“Shit!” She remembers. Lunch and racquetball. She told him noon. It must be at least two by now. It’s funny – there are clocks everywhere, but she doesn’t like to look at them. “I’m sorry. The game-”

He shrugs and holds out the coffee. “Racquetball’s boring.”

She wants to say What isn’t?, but she takes the scalding coffee (which should burn her hand but of course doesn’t) and steps back. “You want to come in?”

“Only for a minute.” He walks past her. His cologne smells the same. The way it did when she sat in front of him for her first interview, reminding herself over and over not to fidget, to keep her hands still. The way it did the time they worked all night on the McCaffrey case, even though she had a stomach virus, and she had to sit four desks away from him to make sure she didn’t catch a whiff.

The way it did when he walked into holding to tell her that Jack had been infected with the biotoxin.

She wants to hit things, split her knuckles, see blood and ripped skin.

Skin doesn't rip here.

“You okay?” he asks.

“No. I want to go home.”

He sips his coffee. It’s so quiet she can hear him swallow. Time stretches, whatever time is, here.

“Why do they deliver goddamn Newsweek?” she asks, as if this is at present the most important question in the world.

Larry sets his coffee cup on the counter and takes a few steps toward her. “The night I got here, the only thing I cared about was finding out what happened to you and Jack. I didn’t mind being dead except-” He rubs the bridge of his nose. “It makes me a terrible person to be glad you’re here, right? It does. I know. But I am.” He pauses, and Renee watches his face, changing expressions like a kaleidoscope. “I missed you.” His voice is quiet and haunted.

She takes a sip of the coffee. It’s the best coffee she’s ever tasted, and she doesn’t care. “I miss him,” she says. “I want to know if-”

“I know. But it doesn’t work like that. So play racquetball with me.”

He’s hazy and swirled through the liquid that distorts her vision. She smiles, muscles without meaning. “Okay. Let me change.”

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Augh! I just realized the trauma of writing comment-fic in your own journal is that you can't edit it. I was up at 4:30 a.m. thinking of ways to make this better. So if it vanishes and reappears, you'll know what happened;)

Anyway! Thank you for reading, even though it's just . . . rough. I don't blame you for loving a show with no heartbreak at all. Apparently, I'm just not cut out for them. New this week right? Yay!

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Augh the Wakefield cycle? THAT IS NOT COOL, MAN. I'm sorry:( That's definitely one of the downsides of being an English major.

I'm so awesome I totally forgot about Chuck last night. I might stream it tonight though!

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[marinw.livejournal.com]

Whoa. Yeah, some Larry/Renee. Where are they? Heaven?

That was great. And a quick turnaround. And so surreal. Go you.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Of course they're in heaven! Because they're awesome. I have a hilarious riff in my head on what poor Jack's gonna do with all those women when he gets there. Maybe that's why he keeps managing not to die;)

Thanks for reading even though it's not your prompt! I decided to just do these as comment fic to get myself moving and see if it reduced the pressure. Quality suffers, but at least I write something, and I've been missing that.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[dealan311.livejournal.com]

I'm all verklempt over here at the idea of them hanging out in heaven and wanting to be there but not being able to. The absurdity of Newsweek and racquetball are nice touches, and Larry being so...Larry with his concern and love for her, even if it's not the way she needs to be loved.

I like this a lot. A LOT A LOT. You might even say as much as I love ALOT.

I'm in a weird mood right now, but thanks for the ficlet and the reminder of how much I loved their friendship.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Well, you're part of the reason I feel for Larry so hard, although in the end I'm sure it would have happened no matter what. I'm actually surprised, now that it's all over, how high he ranks in my list of "24 characters I adore."

You love it as much as you love ALOT? That's a lot! ;)

Sorry you're in weird mood. We should hang -- I've been in one for like a week now. But you have premiere week, so that should be cheering you up! Thanks for reading my insanely quick flashfic here:)

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[sardonicynic]

Oh.

Oh.

I love this. A lot. The ordered chaos and the flawed perfections; the details about the clocks and the coffee — it's like stepping into a world Dali built, only it makes more sense. Until it doesn't. ♥

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

it's like stepping into a world Dali built, only it makes more sense. Until it doesn't.

Oh, you. That is the best compliment ever, given what the fuck ever I was trying to do here, all while in the process of making myself write flashfic just to prove that I could. Or something.

And of course my shippy self thinks Renee wants Jack more than she wants heaven not that I'm especially seeing the distinction;)

Thanks for your lovely comments on my crazy little ficlet! ♥

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[uptownfancybway.livejournal.com]

Holy pile of rotten bananas, I love this.

I might even call it one of my favorite pieces of your writing. For real, I had chills reading this. The fact that you wrote it from the 'afterlife' is just brilliance.

Skin doesn't rip here.

Oh my GOD.

It just freaks me out that she's dead. Like, DEAD. I don't know.

This is fantastic.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Well, the afterlife aspect of 24 is something that's been insanely alive in my head ever since Larry died, so the appearance of this fic is probably . . . not as surprising as it might seem to normal people;)

But I'm so glad you like it, even though the subject matter is beyond depressing. Given that I was going to write it, somehow it comforts me that he's there, because regardless of the fact that it's not the kind of love Larry would like to have from her, these two do love each other so much, and every time I watch S7 knowing how it all turned out, that fact stabs me in the gut even more.

She's not dead. I just have to write that AU;)

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[adrenalin211.livejournal.com]

I really liked this. "Whatever time is" and "Skin doesn't rip here" and how it's so viscerally in present tense.

I love Larry so much. I love your line about how much he cared about what happened to Renee AND Jack, because I think he really would, and I think he WOULD feel better to have her where he can keep a protective eye on her, even though the whole idea is ludicrous because they're fucking dead and ...

This whole thing seems so WELL thought out in the way that it so perfectly doesn't quite make sense. It feels real. Like the coffee and the idea of being in this perfect place but not having perfect emotions to go along with it. Clocks everywhere, but time doesn't matter. That she calls life "home" and she misses it, and the bathrobe and wanting to see blood. The emotions are just so ALIVE in her and it's all so perfectly contradictory, you know?

This is just SO FLIPPIN' COOL IS WHAT I MEAN TO SAY! Thank you for sharing, bb.

Meh. How come I don't have a Larry icon that's not silly?

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Aw, bb. You're even commenting on my zany flashfic here? (And thank you in advance for your epic review of my action attempt -- response to that coming!) Augh the things I'd go back and change now. I am NOT cut out for this type of writing. But in any case, I'm super glad you liked the premise, weird though it is. I should probably be disturbed by how much sense it makes in my head. I'm glad that the dissonance between normal and really not normal worked, because that's what I was going for.

I don't have a Larry icon that isn't silly either. And the more time that passes, the more I love him, so I probably need to remedy that. I should get a good cap from when he had to tell Renee about Jack. His little face. MEEP!!!

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[century-fox.livejournal.com]

Holy fuckcakes, this is beyond amazing. It’s so beautifully written and it made me cry and I can’t even put into words how I felt while reading it.

I love the fact that even though Renee is in heaven, which is supposed to be this place of happiness and perfection and eternal bliss, she’d rather be back in real life with stained bathrooms and torn skin and blood if it meant she’d be with Jack. GAH. That made my heart explode.

the bitter veneer that shrink-wraps her words You seriously always write the most awesome phrases EVER.

Everything you said about time - there are clocks everywhere, but she doesn’t like to look at them and Time stretches, whatever time is, here.- is just so cool.

Larry! Your characterization of him is so epic, and fuck, the interaction between them is so perfect I can’t even. Larry wanting to be there for Renee and being sure she’s okay and the fact that he’s glad she’s there, but knowing how much she misses Jack. And I loved his face “changing expressions like a kaleidoscope.”

She smiles, muscles without meaning I can see that facial expression SO perfectly.

God, I just…don’t even know what to say. I just love this so much and you did such an amazing job of creating this setting and writing Larry and Renee and, as always, I am blown away by how talented you are.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Augh! I'm so sorry I made you cry. I actually kind of depressed myself writing this, because it made me think so much about Larry and how in the end, he just loved Renee and wanted her to be safe and balanced and not you know, chopping off people's thumbs!

But of course my shippy self can't write her as anything except wanting to be with Jack, so there you go. I'm glad you . . . well I won't say enjoyed it, because that's not right, but that it gave you emotional emotions, as we used to say in the SVU fandom.

I have this thought for your prompt that just won't work itself out in my brain, but I'll get there. *huge hugs for you*

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[cybertoothtiger.livejournal.com]

*grumbles about comment weirdnesses*

Trying again:


Laaaarrrryyyy!

*sniffles*

I miss him so hard.

I love this. Although -- they're not going to make me play racquetball in heaven, are they? Please say no.


Just for kicks, I made a wordle out of your fic:



Guess which word occurred most often? Is that not perfect?

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

Oh god I can't even believe how much I miss Larry. It's actually sort of ridiculous, given my hatred of him through a decent chunk of S7. And now . . . AUGH. I was watching part of 7x19 the other day and I almost keeled over when Renee went to see his body. Meh.

And holy frak you made me a wordle! I'm DYING that coffee is the biggest word. That is . . . poetry. The wordle. Not my fic. Just to be clear.

I hope you don't have to play racquetball in heaven. I just kinda made that up;) Thank you!

Holy FRAK I need a non-goofy Larry icon. What is wrong with me?

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[cybertoothtiger.livejournal.com]

I like that right under 'coffee' it says front holding wants Jack time. Okay, so it actually says 'time Jack', but we know what it means, right?

I always loved Larry. Right from when he called Jack out for getting all up in his face. You go, Larry boy.

Re: Renee/Larry [Any place except your heart]

[leigh57.livejournal.com]

I always loved Larry.

You're so evolved! I really kind of hated him in the beginning because he was such a big cockblocker to my ship. It's amusing (and so effing sad, now that we know everything) to go back and look at my post-ep reactions during S7. I can't remember when my Larry love finally kicked into gear for good, but it wasn't very long before he died. Woe!