DUDE! hahahaha. Who knew you could write two chicks having a conversation?! This was so realistic and emotional and... just everything I'd want to seeo n the show if we'd been lucky enough to have an extended peek.
What most impressed me about this was the amazing characterizations. Kim... just! She's so every bit like any incarnation I've seen her in on the show. And I believe someone above me said something like... And Renee? Well. Because EVERYONE knows how much you kick ass with Renee. So basically what I'm saying is that Kim sounds like Kim and Renee sounds like Renee and they do things I can picture them doing... and yada yada this is just like a scene out of the show.
Okay a couple more things. I promise not to ramble on forever this time.
The reference to the Olivia "mess" was absolutely awesome and inspired and it made me laugh. But it also made me all SAD because of the WAY you used it. Like showing how Renee really was just SO tired and could only really bring herself to care about Jack at the moment and the pile of legal bullshit she's under. You know? You used that SO well.
Renee squeezed her fingers into the scratchy fabric of the chair until she could feel her fingernails pulling away from the flesh underneath. She didn’t want to know this, not when Jack was lying unconscious in a room down the hall, when he might die without ever hearing Kim say those words. that's worded so beautifully and it's so raw. I just want to hug her.
“I’m sorry. I have this compulsion to show them to everybody.” That's so motherly. And so Kim. I loved that line.
The image blurred and she blinked, bringing it back into focus. “She’s gorgeous.” Without lifting her eyes she added, “In answer to your question about your dad, I thought a lot of things about him. Most of them were wrong, especially at first.” I already raved to you about how that line about the image blurring is entirely fabumouse. But I also love Renee's answer, because of the way I can hear her saying it, and because of the fact it says so much about how she feels about him, even though she HAS only known him a day.
I also love the ending. SO Renee. And I want to read more!
Okay. I'm shutting up now. Great job on this. Can't wait to see the other ones. Muah.
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What most impressed me about this was the amazing characterizations. Kim... just! She's so every bit like any incarnation I've seen her in on the show. And I believe someone above me said something like... And Renee? Well. Because EVERYONE knows how much you kick ass with Renee. So basically what I'm saying is that Kim sounds like Kim and Renee sounds like Renee and they do things I can picture them doing... and yada yada this is just like a scene out of the show.
Okay a couple more things. I promise not to ramble on forever this time.
The reference to the Olivia "mess" was absolutely awesome and inspired and it made me laugh. But it also made me all SAD because of the WAY you used it. Like showing how Renee really was just SO tired and could only really bring herself to care about Jack at the moment and the pile of legal bullshit she's under. You know? You used that SO well.
Renee squeezed her fingers into the scratchy fabric of the chair until she could feel her fingernails pulling away from the flesh underneath. She didn’t want to know this, not when Jack was lying unconscious in a room down the hall, when he might die without ever hearing Kim say those words. that's worded so beautifully and it's so raw. I just want to hug her.
“I’m sorry. I have this compulsion to show them to everybody.” That's so motherly. And so Kim. I loved that line.
The image blurred and she blinked, bringing it back into focus. “She’s gorgeous.” Without lifting her eyes she added, “In answer to your question about your dad, I thought a lot of things about him. Most of them were wrong, especially at first.” I already raved to you about how that line about the image blurring is entirely fabumouse. But I also love Renee's answer, because of the way I can hear her saying it, and because of the fact it says so much about how she feels about him, even though she HAS only known him a day.
I also love the ending. SO Renee. And I want to read more!
Okay. I'm shutting up now. Great job on this. Can't wait to see the other ones. Muah.